Get your damn GED now that you are harvesting a child in her belly
What is a GED?
can't remember last night but the beers were $3.50, so i can count how many I had by counting my quarters
i can afford to take several trips up and down the parkway right now if I wasn't still hanging over my toilet
Woke up on the floor holding a sandwich. Shots. Never again.
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
He snuck into my grandmothers house, broke her lamp, fucked me, then had breakfast with us the next morning. I am an awful granddaughter.
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
The fact that he just came out makes his Lent commitment to give up gay sex so much more meaningful now.
So much for doing Irish car bombs in my grandpa's memory.... Asshole.
I have poison ivy on my dick
WHAT
Seriously, fuck work.
uh yea I'm curled up in the trunk of my car
After you passed out we took your car to the campus and stole a 150lb plaque that's now in your trunk. Happy birthday!
his first fb message to me in 3 years was "is your cock open for business?" im blocking him
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
I need a job that does not involve working with people who wear animal costumes when they get fucked.
i only got to wear my halloween costume for an half hour before it got taken off.
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