I would blow Magic Johnson for a pack of lucky strikes right now. Post-hiv.
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
he was so drunk I had to hold him up and he started crying when he heard an ambulance siren and said "is that for me?"
1. my parents still have sex. 2. being a screamer runs in the family. 3. so much so that i can tell what number of orgasms she's on. 4.so looks like i'm stuck outside a while
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
I think ill wear my dads dashiki but make it sluttier. We shall see
Dude... You called me at 3am to tell me you still had your pants.
You ever fart so hard while you are asleep that you wake up screaming?
On a completely different note: my hookup and i are now in a semester GPA competition. Winner gets froyo and sexual favors. School just got interesting.....
I've got your keys and your panties. You can have one back. Your play honeybuns.
Immediately after sex he layed on the floor and acted like my yellow bra was pac man
I just want a guy who will spank me, fuck me, then take me to my office xmas party. I'd that too much to ask?
I found a loose wire in my thermostat. Couldn't find the pliers, so I used a nipple clamp to fix it.
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
It was beautiful and filled the audience with hope for the future. :3 I wish I could speak more but sleep werk nighty
I asked how you were doing?
Randomize