i cant believe u jumped in someones trunk just to get out of talking to me
Last night i was gna tell u about how i was watching project runway & how i was upset bc they replaced tim gunn & heidi klum. but then i realized that i was watching mythbusters.
True life - we need to smoke together more often
i just passed a truck with a bumper sticker saying "i'd rather be cummin than strokin." god bless the midwest.
You tied the party balloons to your nipple ring so that everyone would know you partied.
it's not a party till someone uses the fire extinguisher.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Imagine that my comprehension level is that of a 7 year old and explain your plan again
I'd say I should re evaluate my life choices, but I'd make the same decisions only faster and wearing a push up bra.
We smoked speed and opium for the first time. ended up harvesting cucumbers with locals at 9am in a farmers field. Laos is fuckin crazy.
Can one of you do me a favor? Light a match and throw it into my room. Bc I'm certain I would rather be burned to death than live in this hell I call my life
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
When you wake up on the bus on 139th but you're staying at 6th
133 to go
I woke up covered in thousand island dressing. I need answers.
this isn't the first time drunken padiddle ended in a fist fight..
Randomize
