my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
No it only became awkward when she walked in with her new boyfriend and we realized we'd all banged her
Poopin on the sidewaaalllkkk. I wish my text told you that was a song
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I was in the library and saw 2 dudes hackysacking in a study room with 3 girls working. I asked if I could join; as soon as I closed the door the chicks offered me tequila shots. study session w/everyone cancelled, I'm busy.
We are stranded. Come find us. Bring an egg
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
He better not be in your backpack
You are a piece of meat with a side of awesome to me.
How do I feel about a girl who has a g string tattooed on
GDI YOU HAVE THE GOD OF FUCKING THUNDER'S NUDES AND YOU DIDN'T SHARE
idk what happened last night but i just wokeup with nothing on but a necklace...what is this, the fucking titanic?
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
Where are all your bongs? Your Dad wants to make sure they're put away before his family gets here.
Umm....in my room, on my closet, under the bed and behind my laptop.
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Randomize
