my computer doesn't work...
why?
i puked on it last night
Circus confirmed... Jello shots before 9 pm are not cocktails for sucess
Dude ur right that IS what a vagina looks like!
Do everybody a favor and GET LAID MORE.
just added God to my list of friends who can only see my limited profile on facebook. its such a relief to know that He can't watch me fuck up my life anymore.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
Why am I a bad person? You were the one trying to get people to eat tape.
The only thing I really remember is repeating "I hope I still have a job on Monday". Oh and pulling my boob out of my dress.
So I take it the company Christmas dinner went well then...
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
yeah, we figured out that passing a joint between cars was a pretty bad idea
Ok but if you die you have to get "I should've listened to Mike" carved into your tombstone
they drunkenly created an obstacle course for the poor hamster and its ball.
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
Omg that was my second thought of the morning.
First was that we had pop tarts.
The dude we met that gave us weed sent me a video of his balls covering the sun like a solar eclipse
what happened last night?
we watched you eat an entire bag of dorritos in the pouring rain... you refused to come inside
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