I think that we as people have rights and that we should at the very least be warned before being subjected to Fergie
I woke up this morning and the first thing i saw was the harry potter tattoo on his left butt cheek.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
It's one of the reasons i'm here, along with emotional support, physical support if you need it, and power orgasms.
Thanks for getting me home last night.
No worries. I'll always be there for you, just like Mufasa.
It's shedding
I told you penises don't tan
i came on her dog
I seriously just found a rose petal in my vagina.
Life Epiphany- I need to have children so I can be the drunk grandma at family functions. Its my destiny.
I may or may not have told him that he's "the only one with a PHD in this pussy"... I should like direct cheesy porno flicks or something.
You should know two things about me,,,1) I am highly sexual and 2) I am HIGHLY competitive so you telling me about how much sex you had with the other girl makes me say "challenge accepted"... you should hydrate.
Why do I always end up with closet ICP fans?
I think someone tried to make a huge bowl of ramen in my bathtub. There's noodles everywhere in my bathroom.
She's going to jail in a few weeks but she just got a boyfriend. Yet I'm still single as fuck.
I woke up spooning with two strangers on Saturday morning... I felt like a sexual sandwich
Randomize
