That's kind of creepy but I guess since I'm wearing your dad's pants nothing is off limits anymore
There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
He told me to fart on his lap because the vibrations turned him on
The best part is that he made someone stop their workout to take pictures of him, specifically so he could put them on facebook. That is an unparalleled level of douchebaggery.
Im pretty sure it started going awry when I asked their mom "How much would it cost me to sleep with your daughters"
You fell on your face and the waitress just brought you a fresh drink
So hungover. Walked into room and poached their catering before realized in wrong place. Scowled and ate it anyway
Haha. Maybe he's one of those feminine men who fucks like a god then makes you fantastic crepes afterwards
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
High-fiving last weekend's hook up in passing on the way to class has given me quite the lady boner.
Eat your greens and take your tequila shots
I planned out my poor life choices for the weekend.
I hate him but I love him for what he does which is me
I've just realized that today's rations have consisted of turkey bacon and jack Daniels.
Randomize
