so i used to love airports for the escalators... now its the bars... then the escalators after the bars
all but 2 of were put on probation for disorderly conduct. i know, visiting a hospital when your drunk is really stupid but it seemed like such a good idea at the time
swear to god, "it seemed like a good idea at the time" is gonna be on your epitaph
this islike a room full of reasons why i should be in prison
no i do not regret standing at the wendys drive thu handing the employees mardi gra beads to get free chicken nuggets
i didn't realize we were even dating until i ran out of weed
the point of no return was when you "drugged" his drink with glitter. face-planting on his dick was beyond.
No more co-pays for contraceptives. Whoever says Obama is a bad guy has clearly never had a pregnancy scare.
HEY. That drawer full of booze in my dorm room also has aspirin and Tums in it. So don't tell me I don't care about health.
He's writing a strongly worded email to Trojan right now
I TOLD YOU THE BARESKIN CONDOMS WEREN'T AS RELIABLE.
if the furniture in my bedroom wasn't shape shifting... this would be a different story.
Ive been high since the plane left the ground in Los Angeles and Ive been in Chicago. Right now, Im on a train headed towards downtown to go to an anime convention. At this point, I am just taking life as it comes, furries and all.
so I may or may not have had intense sex to mozart's greatest hits on vinyl... I don't know if I should be proud or just really disappointed in my nerdness
Not sure if I should ask if I can have my underwear back or just avoid that all together.
dude, totally just walked home...using pizza as gloves
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
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