those are such fre$h shoes
going to ignore the use of the word "fresh" in a sentence that isnt related to produce and/or other food stuffs and especially the part where you replaced an "s" with a dollar sign
fuck dude i blacked out on a tuesday. what am i doing with my life?
Winning.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
note to self... there IS such a thing as having too many birthday shots...
And then the cop told me my court date was on 4/20. I said come onn u really gunna do me like that
She is two pictures of justin bieber away from being blocked from my news feed
according to the random from alabama i slept with last night i kept saying "poor lil tink tink" over and over in my sleep
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
telling her she was ovary-acting wasn't the greatest idea. doing it in a text so she could see your spelling was where you really went wrong, though.
I'll pretend I don't know she's blind, my morals claimed the back seat in this adventure.
i warned you not to do dabs 20 minutes before graduation. You never listen
I have a bunch of bug bites on my ass... This is why you don't have sex against a tree in the woods
Oh you mean the girl that gave me a black eye when I told her I liked her fake eyelashes?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
Taking one of the loudest shits ever at work and I have to say...I'm having a better time than I thought I would
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