So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
If I banged a coworker last night but didn't enjoy it can I put it down on my timesheet?
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
i put his shirt in a ziplock bag to preserve his smell
please tell me you are kidding me
I could get a dump truck for 1000. Think of the possibilities.
He told me he was in a Proactive commercial. It didn't seem to work for him but he was buying me shots so I slept with him anyways.
Dude found out there's an open bar at the celebration of life thing for my grandma which is at noon. Now I know why I can drink so much
All of the texts in my phone just say "BEER". I woke up with glowsticks on my arm. What happened last night?
New wedding record, my shirt was off by 8pm!!!
What I do when I'm blackout drunk is none of my business.
I woke up wearing a headband made of condoms. It was supposed to be a crown for the "prettiest fag hag" award I won last night. There is lube in my hair. I'm going back to sleep
I need a light and a towel. ive got cum in places ive never had cum before.
I'm not strong. I'm hormonal, sad, lonely, and trying to get laid via tinder
You’re about to have a sober threesome with a rando at a Fenway bar?
Randomize
