Just looked in the bathroom mirror before getting to this exam to see If I look as bad as I feel & the answer is no. I look amazing, even in yesterday's clothes
I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Last night this chick queefed when I was going down on her. Thinking if you! xo
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
His mom just described him as a manipulative, deceitful bastard -- oddly I still want him
He took out the lube and started calling it fuck fluid
I woke up on a futon in some strangers house. They were eating pizza and told me everything was going to be fine.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
The mystery gender stripper never showed up with that party burrito last night.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
i've written a new chapter in the saga of unexpected dongs
I've counted 3,503 loops of fabric on my carpet so far. FUCK YOU ACID!!!
She dropped the call after she told me she doesn't want to hear about how loud he can scream.
Randomize