I want to make a zoo with you.
i messed up with two guys last night...one i pranked and left the phone on..the other one i went crazy on trying to be his girlfriend after four jagermeister shots...
I was just texting to see if your vagina was working yet.
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
if that's jizz on my steering wheel i'm gonna be pissed...and impressed.
Oh btw, that was a wonderful blow job. You did a good job.
Fuck at this point id do just about anything for 20 bucks
That has been your downfall in past encounters with 20 dollars bills
how bad is she
captain morgan with tits
Can we play rock paper scissor shot again? I want to black out in 15 minutes or less...
It's embarrassing enough people in my life are aware of the ridiculous things that happen to me. I don't think we need to get the whole world involved.
Hey it's Males-You-Probably-Wish-You-Hadnt-Had-Sex-With Monday. MYPWYHHSWM
She asked how comfortable I was with her while we were in the shower. She then proceeded to pee in said shower.
She invited us over for cocaine and donuts
I feel like that xmas present negates everything we were taught as little girls. Putting out DOES pay. God bless us everyone
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
Randomize
