I think they gave out some kind of ugly girl scholarship I don't know about...
All I'm saying is that whoever owned the wheelchair clearly didn't need it or they wouldn't have been able to leave it there
I found her in the bathroom licking her screwdriver off the floor. she said there was no way she was wasting a $6 drink.
why is my underwear the only thing i was wearing that smells like vodka?
Put it this way, at one point I was getting stoned on the roof of the strip club with one of the strippers while another one gave me a free lap dance. That wasn't even the best part of the night.
I told her the job opening requires being on the phone during the week and on my face on the weekends. I think she wants the job.
He did a line of coke off my stomach then flipped me over and smacked my ass. Then, while he was talking dirty to me, he told me he wanted to hire someone to clean my room. And that's when he lost his boner. Life is so hard.
I COULD BREAK CONCRETE WITH MY FOOTBALL ERECTION.
He also has scotch. LOTS AND LOTS of scotch. I think you'd like him!
That is always a wonderful personality trait!
Jager makes that raccoon appear... The one that shits in a basket in my living room.
But truly, sorry about your empty vagina
Thanks boo.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
How much glitter would I have to ingest in order for a "magnificent" amount to appear in my ejaculate?
I've had way too many dicks in my mouth the past two weeks. Ready to go back to school and be a doctor now
By the way, you're like fucking spiderman. I've never seen someone climb out of a car window that fast and eloquently.
Randomize
