uhhh i just had a guy tell me he's seen more jam bands and done more drugs than i could err imagine. what a turn on.
I missed Saved by the Bell this morning, but Ashley in a later episode of Fresh Prince is keeping the morning wood alive.
quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
Let's turn this shoulder dislocation into a positive. Come to the hospital, bring some beers, let's party.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Need you on the dancefloor. Hungry and lonely.
My attorney has my name in her roldex as need to hit that. Im gonna win my case
I think I just gave my niece a weed pinata...
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
He also ordered me a vibrator last week, so the flowers kind of balance it out
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
All I want for Christmas is my co-worker's speakerphone to be thrown against a brick wall, and the remains burned in a backyard fire while I roast a hot dog over it. Is that so much to ask?
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
His ass is a ten, but his personality is a two. Which would average to a six if I didn't have to figure in apologizing to all and sundry. In short hard no. Get a new wingman.
Randomize
