Its ok relax. i can tell ur gonna start raggin. talk 2 u next week
i think the world will end when pigs can fly. think about it, everyone says blah blah when pigs fly. so shit would be going down if they ever can.
oh fuck your right
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
All I wanted to tell you is that I fucked a guy covered in fake blood, who circumcised himself.
Im in a bar and I just invented a scrabble drinking game. People are cheering. It's like the universe has aligned itself.
I have hooked up with someone in EVERYONE OF MY CLASSES.
That's how you know you deserve to be a senior
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
Three guys came up to me at the bar and started dancing on me, while screaming "Johnson's girl." That's the last time I sleep with a freshmen.
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I used to be terrified of what was under your bed until I passed out there last night. Now it just feels like home.
When were you at my house?
Also, totally got laid in my yellow rubber boots and it was awesome.
He fucked me in one of the back rooms at the club then gave me an altoid. I have mixed feelings about it still.
You've discovered your super power: Your Vagina
I cant believe you bit her ass cheek, she must have been really weirded out.
yeah so we made out to make it less awkward
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
