i've got a dick and you've got a pussy....what is the problem??
I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
stuffed animals make me feel really maternal.
I wanna fuck padma even more now that she's preggers. Is that sick?
Yes but- 100% agreed
You get to witness red pubes. I'm almost jealous. That's like my dream.
okay, this game isn't funny anymore. tell us where all the forks are.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
She's like an enigma, wrapped in a riddle, tossed in miller light, inside a question. Nobody can explain a Heather.
Just had the "whores are people too" talk with Mom. Bright side it's Christmas, and I may have been drunk, I don't think she caught on.
I have vodka and explosives. For once, we can blow something up that isn't a blow-up doll.
At some point he mentioned fried rice and take out... I don't think we know how sexting works
Remember when we used to smoke out of an apple at the playground? Those were some precious moments
I had sex in the tube at that same playground once. That park is full of memories.
I'm gonna cum garlic butter
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
How was your night?
Good. I made people cry and run home
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