He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
do people in england often walk their sheep on leashes? or is this guy the exception to the rule?
Have you ever chased with pilaf before? Because dont.
God that barista is texting me bout his life like i care i mean dude just hook me up with free coffee thats why i gave you my number
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
He is gay. There is no bi when you have a manhunt AND you are an art major. That's like a unicorn without a horn, it just isn't possible.
Pretty sure I just became my mom's wingman
If he survived pride he can survive a gay bar
What is it with the dog running away when we have epic hangovers
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
This is even better than the wine from my laundry basket
Woke up to your boyfriend in my bed last night. What's that about?
Pretty sure by 1p, she had fucked all of my bodily fluids out of me. I'm now trying to replace them with bourbon so 2016 is turning out pretty good.
It's hard picking what to wear when you know the plan is sex. Like can't I just wear my robe let's just simplify this.
He’s 21. The president of his frat. I’m 28 and have a career!
Do it. It’s a noble position.
Randomize
