You think ghandi was good in the sack? cuz i sure do.
I'm not gay.
Soooo you want ghandi? is that what your telling me?
If ghandi gives good head...I'm in
Its fine.
what do kids with lesbian moms do for father's day? like do you talk about it? is it awkward? do you get the butchy mom a card?
u know u need to get laid when watching mike wazowskis gf from monsters inc makes u horny
Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
I mean I'm basically single. Or maybe just an asshole. Either way.
It's my fault I'm alone. My closest relationship is with my blackberry....thank god it vibrates.
how many days can you live off of Vicodin and frosty?? im going on 4 days......
Kinda wish I banged him. I need the exercise.
Apparently it costs $70 to clean vomit off the side of our apartment building.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
This is a mass text. Surprise drug testing at work today. Either I've finally got to fuck my boss or I've got to quit to make this all go away. Please respond with option a or b.
I called for backup and had two guys carry him to the shower. The bigger guy offered to wash his hair.
I will always remember today as the day I narrowly escaped having to touch a tiny penis
We should start a Help That Bitch Out Fund and split the donations evenly between you two.
Last night I was the DD and was trying to drop off some chick I didn't know at her place. The closest thing to an address I got was "where the goldfish go."
Randomize
