he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
you threw up in thedumpster behind red robin
and kept yelling "DIRTY BIRD"
So I'm banging this nun...
Isn't that how all good stories start? I like it already...
Don't use my boy Weezy to support your whoreish tendencies.
john hughes is dead. crushing any and all dreams of me ever being in an 80's john hughes film. bummer.
do you think my med school application would be worse off if "I like helping others and shit" slipped into an essay I emailed last night?
Went to my car this morning. Found a waffle from Waffle House in the front seat. No idea how it got there. So hung over I ate it.
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
He peed in the bird bath. Those birds are gonna be pissed
Do you think it's wrong for me to hop on that dick before he realizes that he's gay?
so I think we need to change lawn care services...the guy woke me up by the pool while I was naked...told me he already picked up all the beer cans for us and gave me his number for the next time we party...
Your sister just admitted to being a " much bigger bitch" than you. So you've got that going for you, which is nice.
I had to cum in my sink.
what a classic moment of my life. A buffet of taco bell and a taser gun.
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