your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
He better hope I dont die soon. Because I would haunt his bitch ass and cock block 24/7
I just noticed my teeth are no longer straight. Wondering if anyone had an explanation.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
He did plead exhaustion. And I made him push through it. I am like the motherfucking badass football coach of sex.
All three women i have fucked in the past week are here in the same bar. Gameface, go.
Gonna go for any of them?
Thursday night girl, but friday is watching and tuesday is serving us.
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
He put up a Facebook album attempting to sell off their Harvard furniture. Items for sale include: his friend, a broken lamp, an item described as a 'carpet and/or sleeping bag', a pair of paint stained cargo pants, size 'Tyler', and a self proclaimed $3 bottle of wine, which he is offering for $2
Dude. I legit missed class because I got too engrossed in the porn I was watching. Also I need to figure out how to get as flexible as these chicks. Some of the positions they do are outrageous.
You're always so generous when it comes to your dick.
She bought my penis dinner and beer last night. Her words
Yea... The gym isn't gunna happen today... When I was drunk last night I tried to prove I could front flip off the wheel cover of a semi... I fucked up my shoulder pretty bad... It was more of a roll
Blood work from physical was all good, apparently heavy alcohol use agrees with me
Why can't they just let me be the gorgeous cum dumpster that I know I'm meant to be?
Randomize
