I just wish we had the ability to download food from our TVs.
CONQUERED: Sean from next door. Just wanted to let you know ;)
How many people did you send this to?
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I know man...but i cant pass up a catholic school girl fantasy
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
i love waking up at 5am with an imprint of a toilet seat on my chest
Houston, we have a problem
where are u?
Houston. That's the problem. I don't know how I got here.
I just puked while everyone was releasing balloons. Im to hungover for this memoial service. Rest in peace great gramps.
It feels like eating ice cream while riding a unicorn over a rainbow waterfall made of glitter.
That is possibly the gayest thing that was ever thought of by anyone anywhere.
but we were going camping. it only made sense to bring the 6 ft bong
Is it bad that I coached my cousins 6 year old boy to steal a 30 rack of keystone out of an unattended cooler at our family reunion, or was I just giving him a social head start in high school? I err on the side of awesome.
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
I'm developing all these feelings it's disgusting.
I just shook glitter of my birth control packet so I’d say it’s safe to say it was a good weekend
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