Can a clitoris grow tomatoes? Its symbolic and rhetorical.
Overheard: "his girlfriend fucks him with the lights off. It's not serious."
lmfao. well really. it's not love if you cringe at the site of his anus.
I never doubt that you might be drinking at any moment.
i just fell asleep masturbating. I'm no longer surprised i'm single. I can't even pleasure myself.
I wonder if they've ever made a porno about the song "she'll be comin' round the mountain when she comes"
I'm wearing an NBA shooting sleeve while jerking off...and yes my arm has stayed warm
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
Had a farmer come into my class to talk to us today. He apparently met his wife on fb and just thanked jesus for his land. I think I am in the wrong major...
Just be aware that next year I will probably try to seduce you to avoid going to the gym
If you don't get head tonight I will castrate you
Seriously. Castrate.
Learn from me. When going to a booty call do not wear a belly shirt. Nothing says shame like a belly shirt at 7am.
So I wore a corset to school. Fuck laundry.
HIS BALLS ARE HEAVEN SENT FROM THE VELVET ANGLES.
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
Randomize
