Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
I'm just sayin. Is it sad that I spent my last dollar on a hamburger just to get a paper bag to huff out of?
Dude manswers just said that a guy can only cum up to eight times in one day. I'm gonna prove that show wrong.
ha well at least you have goals.
You kept telling that ginger girl, "it's not your fault, it's not your fault, it's not your fault."
Listening to her yell about my drinking problem is not helping my hangover.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
Just stabbed myself in the face trying to lick melted cheese off a kitchen knife.
That man gives me hope. I can't help it. And by "hope" I mean "wood."
Sorry about all of the penis things that happened last night.
Broeke and glass. I feel so and. Appilogixe in morbing.
Chris used to fill up a Camel Back for thirsty Thursday. God I really miss him, do you remember when he gets out of jail?
You must have my penis confused with someone else's...which is disappointing
yeah I woke up in jail with two different shoes on and neither of them were mine
And that is why I love you so much. You have the same cold black heart as me.
He put your tit in his mouth. Professionalism is out the window after that.
okay valid
Randomize
