Today let's steal peoples pets out of their backyards and leave ransom notes
Either she got face surgery at midnight, or i need to stop drinking...
He just said he wasn't going to drink on Saturday because he was drinking on Thursday and Friday...we need new friends.
You pulled the fire alarm because you had to shit and there was someone in the bathroom. you said you needed privacy
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
I'll try not to. I have an appointment at the hospital tomorrow so my goal is to wake up there.
She told me she's going to buy a projector so she can watch porn on her ceiling...I'm telling you man this chick is going places
My booty call just put me down for a reference for her job at the hospital. What am I supposed to say? She gives great bj's?
Screw them and thier engaged asses. I've got liquor to drink and boys I don't know to make out with.
True but, who really needs money in europe? Just barter with sexual favors. A bowl of cereal is worth a blowjob.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
get ready to load up the weird cannon and blow a load of buck-wildness all over the place people
These are all good points. But, I think your under estimating what it's like to be held upside down for a standing 69
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Seriously insulted!! You can not share my dick pick with your gay brother. He won't quit poking me on fb
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