just come out here and I will go home with you...
the women in the ladies room did not appreciate my innovation of turning a sink into a urinal
should I fuck that poor girl
no dude she won't be able to afford a fucking abortion
you kept naming everything at the party...like "boy i'm going to make out with" and "table i'm going to dance on later"
Just passed on a threesome. I'm too old for that kind of morning after.
its great to know that you distinguish your relationships on whether you can cum on someone's face
he said he wants to do me james and the giant peach style. im afraid of what that means. but moderately excited. wish me luck.
so, are you laying bloody on campus somewhere or did you go out after class and forget to let me know?
bloody. ill be home soon.
She just pulled out a chicken strip and a hundred dollar bill from her purse. This is a legit twentyfirst bday weekend.
The only good thing about this is that the pharmacy guy will stop trying to add me on Facebook.
We stayed up until 4:20 AM. The next thing I remember was waking up at 4 PM, like my internal alarm clock knew.
And that facial hair. He might as well shave it so it spells "douche" on one cheek and "nozzle" on the other.
He couldn't get his dick hard. So he started yelling at it. " EVERYONE is laughing at you, you piece of shit no wonder you can't get pussy" i wonder if that happens frequently I'll try again next weekend
im drinking out of a pineapple, so yea.
Woke up with a bed full of sand...care to explain?
Isnt is self explanatory?
Randomize
