If she didn't want me to pass out in her bathroom, then she shouldn't have such a furry rug in there
Its where this guy sticks a jar up his ass. Be prepared to be suspended between vomiting and cheering.
apparently he was unaware pussies come in unshaved form. curse you redtube and your unholy lies
If youre the one that ate my brownies this morning I only have two things to say to you
Those had pot in them
And good luck on your interview asshole
We drank a $4 handle of tequila until 5 am. Please think about that.
well the first picture of me in 2011 involves a viking helmet and chugging champagne. i like this year already.
He's so young, I keep getting a mental image of him in footie pajamas. It's cute but it's wrong. Or is it?
Well I just put wine in my tea
I wrote "fuck you meg" on my toaster strudel with the icing. I call it "passive aggressive breakfast"
We got a lap dance! I touched a boob!
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
I'm trying to make sure he doesn't drown in the toilet. Because I'm a nice lady.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
I slept with my wedding DJ..... I think this means my life has come full circle
If ur gunna go fuck a guy that's in the baseball hall of fame do you need to shave your legs? I'm so lazy
Randomize