so... how was it???
he had bart simpson sheets. he had itunes on shuffle and "don't worry be happy" started playing when he took his boxers off. sad to say i was neither worried nor happy
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
he just quoted gucci mane to try and get me to give him head.
Almost peed between 2 cars...till I realized that it's daytime and I'm sober.
Just saw a woman in a hospital gown with a Steelers jersey on top smoking a cigarette while hooked up to an IV outside of the hospital. I love Pittsburgh.
If I refrain from fucking my manager, I'm going to reward myself by fucking that guy from the photo department.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
That ACT prep teacher knew i was hung. I could see it in her eyes.
You tried to pay for our cab with the 2 dollars you got from selling your natty ice outside the strip club.
I say this as a friend, you would make a SPECTACULAR crossdresser
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
I told you that you couldn’t eat fifty tacos, you slapped me in the face, ate seventeen tacos, and fell asleep on my floor
Juice tastes so weird without alcohol
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