I miss you. Just wanted to say that before the drugs kicked in so it's legit.
he wouldnt have sex with me because his guild had a misson on world of warcraft.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
i'm ready for this baby to gtfo so i can get coked out.
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Bring it all. We will have a potluck of drugs. It will be magical.
I come back upstairs and there he was sitting in a speedo. He handed me a blanket and said "let's cuddle" how is this real life?
I am the sex elephant in the room. Again.
Judge me all you want, but while you are stuck at home eating Ramen and tap water, I will be dining with some guy who, although might be the same age as my father, is filthy rich.
420 is off to a bad start. Mark wake/baked WAY too much, and he has spent over $50 on the claw machine in the grocery store.
I woke up with a bagel in my mouth, still ate it. Free breakfast
Please don't fuck the professor. We both know that won't end well.
Do normal couples celebrate occasions naked with Chicken McNuggets and BBQ sauce?
If you get banged by this bartender you know you can't be mad at me right? Its the rules.
Hey, what's the French word for when you meet your boyfriend's friend and you have that gut feeling that you smoked pot naked in a hot tub with him at a house party years ago?
Randomize
