my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
Living well is not the best revenge. Fucking his brother is.
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
Found out why I didn't have to go drug test. My boss grew pot to pay for grad school.
You insisted on calling your mixture of Bacardi & powdered milk "a Jamacian Facial."
Because of his penis, I can't even look at a hot dog
My boss walked in on me puking in the urinal while taking a piss. Sunday funday is eroding my last shred of credibility at work.
We aren't really supposed to respect our bodies til our mid twenties.
He sent me a picture; erect penis, cat in hand and no pants on. He got a boob pic for that one.
I'm wearing a cape at the laundromat. I really can't say shit
Opened the apartment door and the smell of sex and weed literally slapped me across the face. Kudos.
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
How drunk are you?
Completed.
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
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