Party's warming up, a tranny just got here...
I thought you should know that you passed out in your trash can last night.
Thanks for throwing up on me.
Its alot easier to hide alcohol when your wearing a toga..
everythings easier when your wearing a toga.
He did a 4 wheel burnout and yelled at the cops "Sorry! It's for a school project!". HOW does he think of this shit?
Siri just reminded me to pickup Plan B
we probably should not get naked in my neighbor's garage again. just sayin
I went to the bathroom, came back, and my friend was sleeping leaning up against the stripper pole.
i was giving head the other day and thought of your all penis tastes the same quote and couldnt stop laughing
Sometimes in life you just have to realize the security deposit isn't worth it.
Is it too far to say to someone "you're useless for everything besides sex"
I just want an early 40-something dude who is vaguely unencumbered, professionally driven and wants to put me in a ball gag.
Had to admit my broken elbow was caused by vodka, not hockey
Well that's very sweet of you. I have a strange feeling you're going to regret this when you sober up.
NO REGRETS FUCK DA POLICE
You know, normal sex stuff involves shitting your pants. If you do it right.
That confirms what we've all known all along. I'm a bad gay. I have no fashion sense.
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