Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Herpes is a lot like Arnold Schwartzenneger. Because it always comes back. Also, because it is usually in some way in control of California.
After going down on me he either said "there, it's over" or "there's an odor"... I couldn't hear him and was too embarrassed to ask him to repeat himself. I just got dressed, grabbed my bag, and left. So I don't think there's gunna be a second date. =(
So how does it feel getting boo'd by the entire 5 guys restaurant
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
How was the picnic?
We played softball, except our team sucked. In one hand was a mitt, the other a beer.
Why didn't you put them down?
No beer left behind.
We kind of broke a table making out. So yes, I'd say it was successful.
I told you being able to play expert on guitar hero would get us laid one day
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
You're just a heartbreaker with a knitting problem
I smoked all his weed and he hasn't noticed yet. But I might need a place to crash when he does
I'm literally in the bathroom for two minutes and I walk out to a random dude with his face in your tits
He sent me a meme at 3am. Usually guys just send me booty calls that late. I think I'm in love
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
I just got wasted for $3.50. My life can't get any better.
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