she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
I did a mental Irish jig when he pulled out the second condom.
Let's get back to talking about you giving me a blow job.
I woke up with my left arm looking like it got mauled by a lion. Oo and she said someone broke her car window.
Just realized these events may be related.
No, I'm not keeping her! I can't become an adulterer and a dog stealer in the same 24 hours...
cliffnotes. writing studyguide on last pack of smokes. glad this semester is over.
Note to self glow in the dark nail polish can be quite the mood killer during sex especially when you notice its working for the first time and you stop everything your doing to do spirit fingers
How does one chug a beer and swing the bottle at someone in a single motion? This guys a beer ninja man
you are never too drunk for berry picking
Already at the river; already getting fucked up. And yes that semicolon is legit because those are congruent statemests
which one of you assholes put my new jeans down the garbage disposal?!
Had a burrito last night in your honor
That's the nicest thing you've ever done
I had a drinkin contest with a person that didnt exsist, fuck withdrawl day
Hold on are you sure that we dont have another roommate?
Yes.
sex on acid sucks though, i want to connect with the universe not your dick.
right after that u started calling me g-force and started trying to bellyslide down his drive way
Randomize
