I can't make any promises. I've tried my best to stay celibate. But if a guys on top of me, Im gonna tell him to stick it in.
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
my family just sang happy birthday to baby jesus. no ones even drunk yet
let me put it this way. im never saying "join in or get out" again unless i know whos in the room.
when i grow up i'm putting garbage disposals in all showers of my house so when you vomit in the shower its easy clean up
I'm covered in salsa and facewash. I think I'm doing something wrong over here.
How am I suppose to fully love you when you cant even open up and try to fulfill my midget fantasy
Can't. I took a Viagra to make sure I wouldnt leave the room so I might actually study.
I have one of those hangovers where you visualize how awesome it would be to climb in your fridge and drink glacier water
Omg drank too much. Threw up in my Santa hat on the train and then of course it leaked all over me.
Like actually I will be single and sad and lonely for ever. Cheese will be my life partner. Robot sex is my future.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
My vagina measures dicks. It's accurate to the half inch.
my favorite part was when you kept waving @ that guy and insisiting it was your cousin..and it wasnt and wondering why he wasnt waving back lol you were legit PISSED
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