THE most awkward situation I have EVER been in
Also, I just threw up a little in my mouth and had to act like everything was totally fine.
he refuses to go down on me anymore when he's high because he thinks my clit piercing stares at him
Dude i just want you to know that when i found you half your mustache was already gone. I didn't do it.
i'm 67% sure he was trying to sing in hawaiian
I just don't get it. Video games don't suck his dick.
just found out this city drinks more beer during oktoberfest than rhode island does in a year.. i'm never leaving
I'm a little nervous about this St. Patty's Day party. Seriously, we're still finding stuff from the Halloween party.
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
You will not judge me for my made-up holiday of wine appreciation day
So I think before Superbowl weekend begins we should all take a look back on last year and learn from our pitfalls... AKA no touchdown shots and kitchen crying.
Pavlovs bj experiment 2012. Welcome to the program.
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
I told him he could fuck me in his Notre Dame jersey if they won and he never texted back. What is this world coming to
you don't go into accounting for the pussy....
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
Randomize
