She just texted me saying, "I wish you were a better person so I could fuck you without regrets"
Breathalizer & tazer party did not go as casually as expected.
Drunkenly bought a $240 realtor course last night. Apparently even drunk me thinks my future is going nowhere
Someone shat in our tub last night. I'm not pointing fingers but you priors make you a prime suspect.
He's passed out. He nodded his head when I asked if he's alive though...so there's that
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
As a plus, I've lost 5 pounds in two days, so "party all weekend" is officially a valid diet plan.
I'm not sure... But I think I just found a porno I starred in during my black out week of '08.
Lets just put it this way. Im meeting his nana after a mind blowing orgasm.
I just had to break into my old house and steal my sex tape. Good times. How have you been?
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
I just want him to hold me after a bad midterm. Is that even too much to ask for after sleeping with him twice?
while on the topic of showers...why is there apple juice in our bathtub?
One minute I'm going home the next I'm getting railed on the back 9.
New drinking game get out your high school year book and take a shot for everyone in your class who's had a baby!
Randomize