You gave him head? He fingered you? A little bit of make out?
WHAT THE FUCK ITS LIKE YOU WERE THERE
What about the words "You're my personal dildo" made him say "I love you"?
The walk of shame is far, far worse on crutches.
I'm at Home Depot to get supplies to fix the wall we cracked by fucking too hard against the bookshelf.
I'd rate him "doable" on a scale from "ew, run" to "you should've already fucked him".
That's about an "8" on normal scales.
I danced with this guy last night, I left like I was humped by a blind baby kangaroo trying to body-box.
Yeah. I asked if there was a finger in my ass at some point or if I had a weird dream. So far he hasn't responded
Let's get matching tattoos, something that resembles our friendship
A tequila worm?
He's attempting to seduce me with thanksgiving-themed sexual metaphors... It's working.
And besides a nice relationship, I just really want to get laid damnit
He's perfect in every other way. Is buying him a cockring too forward or just honest?
Just had to read the instructions to my microwave. How am I so high?
I enjoy the company of your penis
I ordered from the drive thru as i was peeing on the menu
How early is too early to start day drinking? Asking for a friend
About five minutes ago. You’re good now.
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