I'm sorry that you don't think that "Daddy Issues" are a real thing, but I can tell you that some assholes who never went to their daughter's dance recitals are responsible for getting me laid...continuously.
Redeem this text for a blowjob
She just sent me a picture of a heart. I need to stop fucking freshman...
please stop telling ppl youre Alice Cullen when youre drunk
You tried telling the RA that girl you brought home was your mom...
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Just puked off the 5th floor onto a car windshield. This is my life and I'm proud of it.
I've decided he is effectively a mouth, hands and cock held together by bad ideas and compliments, and I'm OK with that.
My father is flirting with a transexual server at hamburger mary's. We can never tell him.
I just made a drug deal 100% through snap chat
Good. Sleepy. In the middle of a pregnancy scare. The usual.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
the next morning his mother came in to tell me that she made breakfast. she told me to put my clothes on too. awkward.
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