I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
He booked us a hotel at a resort in cancun for sprng break... I just wanted to get laid this weekend when i was blackout i didnt know it was gonna spiral into a mess of events like a 5 month in advance commitment
so apparently the car got towed with me passed out in the back seat.
Someones grandma was rubbing my back. I'm way too high for this.
the coastal evacuation route ends at my vagina so you can just skip the bullshit and come over
I cant believe im wasting my plan b experience on this guy. I should have saved it for someone special.
I think my vagina has grown over, not unlike earring holes when not used in a long amount of time.
My phone autocorrected your name to "grownup." that couldn't be more inaccurate. I'm getting a new phone.
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
Please don't mistake my med student status for responsibility. I'm drinking tequila while studying vascular surgery techniques.
I'm already too high to be publicly presentable. I just looked at myself in the mirror without my sunglasses. Debated contacts. Said aloud "But I'm nothing without my sunglasses."
DON'T PUKE iN THE PRINGLES CAN, WHATEVER YOU DO!
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
just because you have a nice tits it doesn't make you a magic little snowflake.
We were too tired to finish having sex so we just stopped to eat the cheesecake and passed out. I didn't mind
Randomize