i want you to feel like i'm letting you into my heart, not just my vagina.
your suggestions for charades were, getting sucked into an aircraft turbine, getting raped by a dolphin, and having sex with a vacuum cleaner. you got your own, and actually used a vacuum cleaner as a prop.
I'm at a party with half naked strippers driving in a little kids battery powered mustang around a stipper pole in his bedroom
and i'm pretty sure he drank the lava lamp
His body is just chiseled out of sex. I would let that man do anything to my body. Including fuck me while my parents watch
Well I consider my vagina a dear friend. She treats me good I treat her good. We work together. Glad we could be of service.
I wish my brain had a "congrats you just defeated the munchies" notification!
You are the alcoholic guardian angel of raccoons
One of us will probably end up wearing nothing but glow/ neon body paint and a pair of water wings...
And I am in no way ashamed to say that it will most likely be me. I'm hoping for it actually.
While I'm on hiatus from the Russian potato nectar, it is my wish for others to enjoy it in my stead.
The guy I brought home last night made a speedy escape while I was in the bathroom. The only trace I found of his flight was a lone sock on the stairs.... It was like a whorey low budget Cinderella
Life is so difficult sometimes. Can you imagine? Going through life, constantly creating boners everywhere you go.
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
Drunk me made cabbage burritos at 1am after going to hustler hollywood.\nI bought socks. Lol
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