lol you are funny thanks bro I'll take you to a strip club
I don't wanna go to a strip club I'd rather get my boobs free or earn them from a series of good deeds
Ha! What's wrong with that? Hard work deserves compensation. I accept cash, checks, and boobies!
Come on, it shouldn't be that hard NOT to suck someone's dick
I just saw a guy wearing a tuxedo shirt under his overalls. That is true iowa class right there
I cant believe she fell for the mistletoe belt AGAIN.
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
i feel like this needs to be a 'lose some teeth' kind of weekend.
You offered me some of your "Jungle Juice." It was just 151 and Absinthe. I don't know how you are still alive.
The guy I fucked in San Diego is camping with us for coachella... Awk.
I still have a scar from the last time she gave me a handjob. There is NO WAY i'll stick my dick anywhere near her again
The lady sitting right behind me on the bus has baby birds in her purse. Shes feeding them bugs from a cup with a pair of tweezers... I love san francisco!
Nope, can't do it. It's a snowball effect. Today, leggings as pants. Tomorrow, female hitler. Natural progression.
No just a slight sexual miscommunication which led to a little (lot) vomiting by one party and a bruised sternum on the other party involved.
I can't even make a guess how that goes.
we were both freshly single and using each other as rebounds. most intense sex I've ever had. i felt like a grizzly bear emerging from hibernation in a whirlwind of sexual fury
Some guy named spider just bought me 5 shots
How weird would it be to ask your bro to 3d print your dick for me
Randomize
