The human being growing inside of her was a mistake. Lets just hope the boyfriend isn't.
we need to get ahold of those "sexting" teens on tyra. HAWT!
wasnt one 13?
shes in my pool wearing only floaties on her arms ill have to raincheck watching march madness with you guys sorry
He took naked pictures of me and told me if I ever got to the Disney Channel level of fame he would help me out. I think i'm in love
She's never allowed to turn 21 again
plan d- we get drunk, go see that Justin Bieber movie and freak out 13 year old girls.
Getting cock-blocked by Jeff Bridges. NOT OKAY.
No more fucking baseball tools. Walk-of-shamed home in only a pinstriped jersey and a Red Sox SnapBack.
It feels like there's puke trying to explode out of me from behind my eyeballs.
You know how I said I hit my head so hard I saw two of him and tried to make out with both? Well, it turns out he has a twin.
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
It was a fun night. I made out with the door guy at the gay bar but he didn't speak english
There was no door guy at the bar
He spilled some of his beer on your shoulder then proceeded to lick it off. By the face you made, I don't know if you were completely horrified or really turned on.
it's 1043 pm. still havent changed out of the shirt i wore last night so at this point i figure i'll go for twosies.
It's fucking 2020, I should be able to watch Netflix in the buff while making brownies without you getting preachy about it.
Randomize
