u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
I was so high i started crying when i saw how much puppychow was there.
i've noticed that whenever i have to ask myself "would i be doing this if i was sober?" the answer is probably no.
Just drive me around campus, I will be able to smell their innocence.
I couldn't help thinking that my sock monkey was judging me
Idk he's just laying there passed out with a French fry up his nose and without any pants on. Boner and everything.
This is now the friendly bartender typing for him. He wants to be on you. He is going to "destroy your vagina". Good luck and sorry if this woke you up!
Ok now a guy in a winnie the pooh costume is grinding on some chick to the song shots
I solemnly swear to help bail you out of jail when you throw a dildo at a politician.
Went and sat in the wrong fucking class for 30 mins, answering questions and shit. What ever this is i will be on it for the rest of the semester.
Idk. The bad part of me thinks it's a good idea. The bad part is also the stupid part.
You're having marijuana delivered to you. You're buying drugs and you aren't even leaving the house. I'm sure he'll be surprised if you're NOT wearing a bathrobe.
God I need to hump something, right now.
He is obviously into the really short sex we have.
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
