You work out of a Hotel?
Do ugly people know they are ugly?
The quiet ones do.
Prereq for being on nyc prep: money, bitchy, and a lazy eye... if only you were rich
i was having this nice romantic moment with my girlfriend. then jimmy came in and peed on the fridge
Edward fifth and chaser hands
I just got stoned alone and repierced my nose. don't ever tell me I'm unaccomplished
I just got stoned by myself and am eating cookies so I'm right there with you
I don't want to be Eskimo brothers with your dad
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Dick very happy bro
We're friends with benifits... The benifits being I'm fucking her boyfriend
If my vagina was a person it would have a bandage around its head and it's arm in a sling rn
i think ive been high everyday since ive met you
Bear grylls would be proud of my improvisation. Just used her vibrator to massage my back after hurting it at work.
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
It’s a good thing I’m the only one in the office today. My boy toy stopped by and now there is jiz all over my desk and couch
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