We video chatted for almost two hours. But I woke up with puke on my keyboard. The question of the day: were we still chatting when I vommed? No idea.
is this the only place in the world where you can get shot on one side of town, and have to stop for cows crossing the street on the other side?
Proposition. Sex. No words, no talking about it later. I just want you tonight.
hearing that almost makes me feel good about peeing on the coffee table
we turned his baptism video into a drinking game
We broke the shower door. Completely off. His roommates were not happy but I sure was
Who topped off the "random beer mix" beer bong with a pinch of pepper?? All you could taste was busch and pepper...
On another note, convinced a 9 year old my hickey was actually a zombie bite.
bad news.. campus security walked me home last night and when i tried to tell them where i lived they assured me they knew where our house was.
I just used my AAA membership to fix a strippers flat tire in return for a lapdance...does that make me a bad person?
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
It looks like you got dick slapped by the sandman..
Let's drink lean at the 5 seconds of summer concert. Give the teens a glimpse into their future as dysfunctional adults holding desperately onto their youth. You in?
my gynecologist gave me a high 5 for not getting any STD's since my last visit and said "Way to go Annabeth!" you have twenty seconds to get to my level
It was bad. U were calling my cat "kittiano" and playing her like a piano. Way too drunk my friend.
Randomize
