remember that time i ran away from the bar and passed out in a street cot?
neither do i
My penis is bigger than his and I don't even have a penis.
My hot female boss's cubical is right next to mine with a wall between us. Do you think it is too forward to make a glory hole in the wall?
dude i dnt kno how, but i think theres a tampon in my butt
we were canoeing in the lake and i asked if he was too drunk for this, and he said "don't worry about it, i'm half native american"
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Her mom offered to give me a lap dance. I was a guest, I couldn't say no.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
Gotta admit I did think about bartering you out to the gay guys for $20 and the dudes flashy neck scarf
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
The groom's brother was an accomplishment. Then I remembered he was also the officiant. Check and check.
He pretended his dick was a samurai sword and that he was slaying me with it is it bad I still wanted him to fuck me
He called me 'pal' while complimenting how well I took his load on my face. I've officially been fuckbuddy-zoned.
Just because you are home alone for the weekend doesn't mean you can act like a nudist.
I accept your opinion but respectfully disagree. Also, I'm sitting in your chair.
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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