I am slurping my drink like I am going to the electric chair
oh jesus shes a lukewarm mess
how the fuck am i supposed to make breakfast with spaghettios and mustard
bad idea #53- masterbating while on period.
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
It's weekends like this that make it obvious why we have to pay to come to college.
I'm watching the red sox through my neighbors window from my bathroom. We're winning btw.
There is a full size piano in the middle of our road. Please tell me you had nothing to do with this.
So he ended up throwing a watermelon that he stole from the cafeteria saying "if i cant have it no one can" of the 5th floor.
he's gonorrhea incarnate
Update is I am officially king of Gettysburg. Tam and I are being threaded like royakt. In bought e ruined a drink
I feel like when purchasing hard liquor on a Monday I also need to buy a happy 21st bday card to not seem so pathetic
who orders an old fashioned in 2014? even my Grandparents think you're an asshole.
Rumor has it that you want to bring me soup in exchange for a blow job.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
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