So I just passed a billboard for "Risque Cafe: Good food and topless women". Fuck. I love SC.
One of my students just wrote an essay on how ninjas, like drug addicts, must realize they need help before they can get better...I gave it an A+
And we started making out. She asked me to pick a number between 1 and 10. I said 6. She took me to her room. A few minutes later I wasnt a virgin. DUDE I WAS GOING TO SAY 2.
I jerked off enough times today to safely commit to the fact that im not getting laid tonight
ok, she started talking about how she swears her step dad killed her mom. starting to back out of this one
You were demanding water from a bottle but I didn't have one..so I just took the water bottle from the hamster cage. You're welcome.
He's a cat fanatic .. That was not in the fine print when we started fucking
He fucked me so hard I had an asthma attack. I'm like the sickly poster child for celibacy.
after we were done she whispered to my dick "you sir, are a genius"
I guess all those years with her as your babysitter finally paid off.
OH HAPPY DAYS YOU'RE BOTH GINGERS YOU'LL REPRODUCE YOUR OWN KIND
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
4 days in college, 3 frat parties. I haven't been this drunk since the unspeakable Jäger bomb incident in Sweden.
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
I wrote life affirmations on my notes to repeat and read several times a day so I become a better person, see the time on the toilet has been constructive
You’ll lick BBQ off my cock but no ketchup on a hotdog?
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