I hope I'm pregnant just to spite you.
i'd date him for the sole reason that he thanks me after giving him head
Unintentionally made him cum in his own mouth, and he just sat there screaming..
after I lost so many games of beer pong they made me be a troll, I sat under the table and told riddles while retrieving balls.
I don't even see the point of going over to his place dressed anymore.
I hope you fall on your chin.
Jealousy makes you ugly.
He is crying over the toilet and his friends just came in and tried to make him take another jello shot.
So I craigslisted sugar daddies and I'm pretty sure I found us one if you can pretend to be asian.
Yeah I don't even know dude. This shit has reached new levels of ridiculous. Let's hope baby Jesus gallops down a rainbow on a sparkling unicorn and wills that bitch clean. I think that's the best chance we've got.
I feel like an elephant shit on me and left me to be miserable
Im gonna go for the gay guy. The ginger is freaking me out.
I found the guy I hooked up with last night on Wikipedia, at least now I know how old he is.
We are actually the same person except with opposite genitalia, which are both incredible.
Is it bad that I tried to build an outfit based around "What do people who use condoms look like when they buy condoms?"
I just woke up drenched in beer, in a puddle of beer, and cuddling a bottle of tequila
Profesor just winked at me. This class might be easier than I thought
Randomize
