Where the fuck is Rob at, he hasnt answered his phone in like 2 weeks.
Dude Rob died 2 weeks ago wtf?
Holy shit r u serious? How?
Just kidding, but im pretty sure he boned your gf and doesnt want to talk to you.
that speech was about as successful as her performance in twilight
I cannot convey how much I really do love Chris Hansen. FYI: he is the JC Chasez of my adult years.
Having drunken flash backs of me giving you a piggy back ride. I was like Jesus, and you were my cross. I fell so many times for you. This is true friendship.
Do you remember giving me altiods and wishing me good luck on the walk home?
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
Now you have tequila AND fuzzy slippers. Fuck you. I want that to be MY night.
Man, I wish they all looked like that. Your vagina deserves to have a nice frame around it, and God's signature at the bottom.
If my sophomore year were to be made into a novel, it would be titled "dances with salvia"
Okay. I am working on pulling a tooth out of my mouth. Call me.
If he thinks that that is an acceptable way to ask me out he is out his goddamn ginger mindddddd.
Waking up in a NH rest stop and reading through my texts is definitely a familiar low
But wait then while giving his drive thru order he goes in mid sentence, "Hey baby it's Travis remember me?"
Do you ever look at someone's Snapchat story and think ‘you told me you would eat my ass’?
When I got home he was in his underpants on the couch, eating pop tarts and crying while watching Voltron.
Randomize
