doug butabi!
steve butabi!
hotties wanna shake it
he was pretty good aside from the whole putting his tongue on my butt thing
its impossible for me to find something that fits my tits my muffin top and my ass all at the same time
Yeah I'm gunna date him. I figure its regular sex and maybe feelings will come in time...it worked for arranged marriages...
You were mounting an escalator last night, shouting "I have no health insurance" at people
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
You know I told you about that hammering at 3 AM yesterday? Turns out it was Holly beating the lock out of her door with a mallet because she'd forgotten her keys.
Doesn't she keep a spare?
Drunk Holly doesn't listen to Sober Holly's plans.
All I want in life is to get high, take a shower, and him to go down on me. Simultaneously. That's legit my idea of heaven.
I've been on this train for an hour and this women has been on the phone and all she's said is "guuurrrrrlllll, gurl, gurl." I may commit suicide.
Just got high and apologized to my vagina for getting chlamydia
I was so gone I thought the cops banging on my door were kids from the party trying to get into my room... needless to say, I started moaning louder so they would take the hint.
Sorry for cyberstalking your dad.
Hahaha perfect. Let's start stopping drinking tomorrow
I've never had sex that lasts this long though. It's ridiculous. I feel like I need a Gatorade and a sweatband and a sub.
You where banging on the wall asking us where we hid the door...you then crawled under the deck thinking you'd be safe. I told you to eat the nachos before the party...I told you.....
Randomize
