She's not depressed. She's just sober. It's like the same thing.
got a scholarship and a hot psych teacher. hello spring 2010
I woke up naked this morning there was a baseball bat on the floor the bathroom door knob was removed and the floor was wet. This is why i don't do Tequila shots.
Well today was Thanksgiving Anti-Miracle Daydrinkathon so I had to be drunk by 2pm
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
First time on E and Chris took me to a petsmart during puppy day. I might die of pure awesomeness.
That's like being smoked out by a unicorn. If the opportunity presents itself you fucking do it and don't ask questions.
speaking of creep .. love how I kept touching strangers faces at the bar ... and saying "Don't worry I'm a dermatologist"
Dude. My cat just tried to bat the tampon string hanging from body. NOT COOL, SEYMOUR. NOT COOL.
also my alarm just went off. I am always amused at what time drunk me decides to wake up.
Stop your judging. I got free booze AND an oil change. You're the one whose always saying we're spending too much money.
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
At what point can I admit that I hate going to house parties?
I don't wanna stand in your shitty kitchen making small talk while I guard the quality booze I brought.
dude if looks could fuck you two would've been naked in front of everybody
Randomize
